The Sex Test

"Good afternoon, Mrs. So-and-So. This is Mrs. B from X Middle School. I’m returning your phone call. I understand that you are concerned about a test the students have to take."

WIth a livid tone, she replied, "Yes. Please explain to me why are you teaching sexual education in your Literature class?"

"Excuse me? Sexual educa-"

"I don’t remember signing any sort of parental consent for my child to participate in sexual education classes. What kind of classroom are you running?"

"Ma’am, I honestly don’t know what it is that you’re talking ab-"

"And why do they have to pass the test in order to pass Literature for the year? What the hell does sex ed have to do with Literature anyway?"

"What!?! What is it that you’re talking about?"

"You told them that they have to pass the Intercourse Test, and that if they don’t pass it they stand a good chance of not passing your class for the entire year. What the hell do 8th graders need to know about intercourse?"

"Ma’am. I am not teaching sexual education in my classroom. The students have to take an End of Course Test to assess whether or not they have mastered the educational standards for this year."

"…Oh…." click!

4 Comments

  1. Ann on February 23, 2008 at 2:33 pm

    Wow! End of course / intercourse. That’s one that’s probably much funnier in retrospect. “What the hell does sex ed have to do with Literature anyway?” Made me laugh. You know, there is sex in a lot of great literature.



  2. Moxie on February 23, 2008 at 3:19 pm

    Following her hasty hang up, I thought it was immediately hysterical. I seriously doubt that I will hear anything else from the rest of her this year. She’ll probably hide out of sheer embarrassment. :o)
    The kids will get a hefty dose of sex in Lit. next year – “Romeo and Juliet” is generally taught around the first part of the year, and most teachers around here have their 9th graders read “As I Lay Dying”. There’s LOTS of sordid sexual relationships in that book. That mom better get ready for that if she thinks sex, in any degree, has no place in a Lit. classroom!



  3. k77 on February 24, 2008 at 3:53 am

    Haha, that’s a good one!



  4. Amy Y on February 24, 2008 at 11:06 am

    That is hilarious! I bet that mom felt like an arse!
    Thanks for stopping by my blog… and good luck to you on your journey!! I hope everything goes swimmingly and I look forward to reading more…