- Write "THIS WAY" on the inside of one thigh and "INSERT HERE" on the inside of the other and draw arrows pointing to you know where on both.
- For bonus points, you can stick Tap Lights to the insides of your thighs. Simply sqeeze your legs together to turn them on, then shout, "LET THERE BE LIGHT!" Tell your RE that you were just trying to be helpful.
- For a fresh transfer or IUI, bring in a brown paper sack with a lidded cup inside and hand it to your RE saying, "I decided not to procreate with my husband; I brought his friend’s sperm instead because he’s much cuter."
- Have hubby/partner give your RE a new stack of pornos while saying, "The selection in there is pretty bad. Have you seen all the neat things some girls can do with a string of beads, lately?"
- Shout, "Peekaboo!" when the RE lifts the blanket.
- Hand your RE one of these and ask if he or she will slip one on you after the transfer.
Ladies, if you got ’em, add ’em.