Bridges

My last post was the shit. I don’t mean “the shit” as in “Moxie’s post about having assholes for kids was so gee-golly funny that it was the shit!” (By the way, it was the shit if I do say so myself, so if you haven’t read it, click on over). No, I mean it in the shit, meet fan kind of way, and it hit last night.

A few hours after I published that last post, Chanel made a lengthy reply. I don’t know how many of you may have seen it. She was the first and only commenter by the time I read it. I unpublished it, not because I had anything to hide, but because Chanel divulged some very private things about herself that she might have later regretted leaving exposed for the world to read. My post stated simple truths, but they both enraged and deeply hurt her. Sometimes it is easy to turn away from and ignore the parts of yourself of which you are not proud. Sometimes the only way people can get through to you is to catch you off guard when you’re looking in another direction.

Suffice it to say that my post triggered a chain reaction of small explosions that erupted into a full nuclear meltdown. But, sometimes that which is broken must be destroyed before it can be repaired. Hopefully, this is a time for construction, for fixing broken bridges and making tenuous first steps forward. What started with fire ended with laughter, but the action of building is what will make all the difference.

Bridging – this idea of raising awareness and making new emotional connections to those around you – is what is at the heart of Bridges. I love the idea of immersion into the experiences of others and feeling a part of the greater human experience. If others are building bridges and walking them, it furthers the feeling that you are not quite as alone as you might feel you are.

I am the contributing editor for Surrogacy. If you haven’t been to Bridges, make a trip soon. The first planks are being laid and your input is welcome.

Today I am going with Chanel to the Air Force recruiting office. She has a chronic, but manageable health problem which we are afraid might prohibit her enlistment. Good thoughts are appreciated.

15 Comments

  1. luna on July 29, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    sorry for everyone that the shit had to hit the proverbial fan. good luck today!



  2. Kari on July 29, 2008 at 12:45 pm

    Good luck, Chanel!



  3. JuliaKB on July 29, 2008 at 12:56 pm

    I saw that reply and really hoped it would be a start of some productive shit-digging rather than an end. Glad it seems to have turned out that way.
    Good thoughts for both of you today.
    Oh, and yes, I was looking at the Bridges place yesterday. It looks very promising. Good luck with that too, and I will be keeping an eye.



  4. Amanda on July 29, 2008 at 2:10 pm

    I hope everything is okay between you and your sister. Hopefully she will be able to enlist in the military. My youngest brother just finished Army basic training and having that stability and structure has been exactly what he needs, to get away from his own demons and to avoid ending up like our other brother who has descended into the world of drugs, crime, homelessness….
    I hope that it can be as good of a thing for your sister.
    Thanks for your comment the other day. I would love to talk to your friend who has been through similar experiences with her baby. Feel free to pass my info on to her. I appreciate your thoughtfulness 🙂



  5. Mommy Lady on July 29, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    To All… one thing about our family is we are strong, even at our weakest. Yes, it hit the fan last night but there are times when true feelings need to be put on the table.
    We are by no means the perfect family. What makes us unique is that we perfectly and purely LOVE each other and that love will continue no matter what bridge we have to cross; whether it’s one we must cross alone or as a family.
    As a mother, I have to have faith Chanel will begin her journey and I will be there for her even if at times I have to appear to be the troll under the bridge.



  6. poppy on July 29, 2008 at 2:18 pm

    I think it is great that you are posting about these things, even if it is hard. And, the bridges concept is wonderful!



  7. anymommy on July 29, 2008 at 3:46 pm

    I am truly sorry that this is such a difficult time for your family. It sounds like you are able to talk about it though, and that is so important to healing. Sending best thoughts that your sister can start anew with the military. I’m going to check out bridges now!



  8. Carrie on July 29, 2008 at 8:48 pm

    Things definitely have to be broken in order to be built back up, and I hope you all continue to laugh and push each other to succeed.
    I hope that Chanel got the answers she is looking for at the recruiting office today.



  9. sara on July 29, 2008 at 10:30 pm

    Best of luck to Chanel – keeping her and you in my thoughts and prayers. Hope all turns out well 🙂



  10. Martha on July 29, 2008 at 11:20 pm

    Good thoughts to your sister, yes, your post was the $hit. Letting go is the ultimate act of love, thanks for sharing.



  11. niobe on July 30, 2008 at 6:22 am

    I like the idea of bridges. Though sometimes I’ve found that the best thing you can do is to burn them and admire the pretty curls of smoke.



  12. Wishing4One on July 30, 2008 at 8:58 am

    Hey lady, been away for a bit, but am going to catch up now on all your posts I’ve missed. I sure hope the drama is not too heavy, i read up on it…. I love the Bridges idea too, wow that Lolli eh? I knew you’d be a part of it somehow. I will send you an email as I want to ask you a few things un-IF related that is. xoxoxoxox



  13. Sara on July 30, 2008 at 9:32 am

    Best of luck to Chanel. It takes courage to try to make changes. I hope that courage will sustain her as she finds her path forward.



  14. Nikki on July 30, 2008 at 12:53 pm

    Thank you for your comment and for adding my post to the Pink Rose Award Recipients. I am going to add your blog to my list too. Good luck in your journey!



  15. Aunt Becky on July 30, 2008 at 9:25 pm

    Sending Chanel love and light and luck.