Fierce

Confession – I have a wild desire to get all glammed up in drag by some outrageously fabulous queens and spend a night in a raucous bar singing and voguing to songs like Boogie Fever and It's Raining Men. I'd stuff my blubber into a DROP TWO DRESS SIZES NOW body slimmer, adjust my abundant cleavage into a push-up bra just so, stretch on shiny stockings, and snake my way into something like a bright fuscia, sequin-sparkled evening gown adorned with plumes purple feathers. My hair – a bodacious neon blue bouffant with sparkly silver accents. Make-up? Caked to perfection. A diva I would be.

I would be audacious and brazen, bold and daring. I'd say the first thing that came to mind and truly wouldn't care what anyone thought of me, but it wouldn't matter anyway because everyone would love me and my witticisms so much that they all leaned in to hear me speak above Gloria Gaynor's affirmation that she will survive.

I love the idea of being an overexaggeration of yourself and giving her a new name and a new face, and of being accepted by the people around you because they also are exaggerations of themselves. You're so emboldened by your new persona that you and she simply can't fit under one name. Your given name is far too commonplace and there is no room for your alter-ego within its restraints. She needs a ridiculously fanciful name like Noxeema Jackson, Vida Boheme, or Chi-Chi Rodriguez or a play on words like Hedda Lettuce, Annida Greenkard, or Sherry Vine. I think I would be Charlemagne* Attraction, but everyone would call me Charlie. Maybe Charlie Traction.

What would your drag queen name be? Lacking inspiration? Try this: Drag Queen Name Generator**

*Homage to Kid Charlemagne, one of my favorite Steely Dan songs.

**Even though I have selected a drag queen name, I tried the generator and it said my name is "Monica Tension".

Here are the results different generator:


Your Drag Queen Name Is:


Sofonda Dildos

Drag Queen Name Generator

Ooookay. I think Sofonda Dildocam is quite fitting. Play along for fun.

If you decide to play along on your own blog, let us know so we can all see who your alter-diva is! Be fierce.

38 thoughts on “Fierce”

  1. LOL – can I come watch when you go out like that?? I totally lacked creativity, so I went on the link you gave, and my Drag name would be Devine Intervention (spelt like that too!!). If only I could get some divine intervention in my real life too 😉

  2. OMG, that episode was too funny, especially when the drag queens came in as men to get fitted.
    I am going to think and come up with a creative name and get back to you.

  3. I love drag shows!! And queens!!! Too bad I bet you live too far away to go together. If you are ever in the Indy area, we can go. 🙂

  4. Aw crap! Angry, I’d LOVE to go to a drag show with you. Too bad I live all the way down in the Dirty South. If I’m ever up that way, you’re taking me out for a night on the town! You didn’t tell me your drag name!

  5. Heh. I went as a drag queen for Halloween once and it was my most favorite costume EVER. I had six inch platform heels with japanese cartoons on them and and completely sequined dress and big wig. I think it’s getting to go so overboard with female-ness.
    Of course, my sister is a real drag king. Which is not as fun, but still very cool. And I think the shows are actually better.

  6. I’ve been reading your blog for a while now and am kinda in love with you (in as non-creepy a way as I could be for an um… internet stranger). This post just solidifies it.
    So, hi. *waving* This is me de-lurking. I’m a 31yo adoption-as-a-first-choice mom to two at the beginning of a TS journey as a surro with untested fertility meeting potential IFs next weekend. *whew!*
    Nice to ‘meet’ you, and thank you for all you’ve shared here… it’s been extremely helpful re: my education.

  7. Hi, E! I’m glad you decided to delurk, because then I might never have found your blog. I left a few comments over there for you and I am completely and totally enthralled now. I’m anxious to watch your journey continue to unfold, and I wish you and DA and DB all the best. Now that you’ve delurked, you have to STAY delurked. No more hiding!
    Cindy: “Anita Mann” … too funny.
    Cali: I think yours is one of the best yet!

  8. hahahaha This is too crazy. My drag queen name is……..Krystal Titz. I almost fell out of the chair laughing.

  9. According to the generator, my drag name is Charlamaine Invention. Hmmmm… I think I might go with something like Chica Licious.

  10. I couldn’t think of anything too creative yet…but I did use the newest generator you posted and I like the name: Marsha Mellow. I guess I would be dressing in all white with some funky Marge Simpson height hair as well.

  11. Actually, I have a stage name already. It’s Blaze ‘n Pepper! (These are actual names of two children I met at a friend’s house) One’s name is Blaze and one’s name is Pepper. I thought it would make a sassy stage name …

  12. My name would be NuPaul. That’s okay because I always got a kick out of RuPaul.
    btw, PLEASE take a picture when you decide to do yourself up to the description! it would make a great halloween costume.
    iclw

  13. let me know when and where, i will be there with bells on. i can not say i share the desire, but i am happy to cheer you on.
    Thank you for all your wonderful comments and support. It means more than you will ever know.
    (ILCW)

  14. Smiling here at the very thought of me in drag too.
    Here from IComLeavWe… (adoption,pregnancy loss, IVF twins)
    My Little Drummer Boys

  15. Rachel Temple Monroe here! How funny. Thanks for sharing this. I can’t wait to send the link to the people I know! Too bad I don’t know enough about makeup to even consider being a drag queen.
    Here from ICLW.

  16. AHAHAHA I love love LOVE it!!! Yes..pics pics pics and lots of em! Holy s*&t…my drag queen name is “Zsa Zsa LaHore”. I LOVE it! It’s a perfect fit for me!

  17. Your drag name is so much cooler then mine. Mine is Miracle Welsley. Now I am having visions of Wesley Snipes in To Wong Foo, which is quite disturbing.

  18. Ivana Dick.
    Pretty fitting, actually, considering I’m a straight woman attempting to get a drag persona. Step one: acquire penis.
    Fun!
    (Here from ICLW)

  19. here from Icomleavwe…
    too funny!!!! I will have to see what my drag name is! great idea for halloween – wonder if I could pull it off?

  20. Moxie,,
    Too fun! You would have fit right in at a place that Ethan and I went to the other night to see a friend;s “show”
    I’m sure you would be an overnight sensation here in the big city!!!!!!
    Susan

  21. I’m not sure what my drag queen name would be…you had me at the “DROP TWO DRESS SIZES NOW” slimmer. Where might one find one of these?? 🙂
    ICLW

  22. Here from ICLW. I saw the project runway with the drag queens and was amazed. Those girls are fierce. I really liked the pink sailor suit.
    I didn’t use your quiz to get my name but using the rules we always had here my drag name is Cinnamon Independence!

  23. Shanda Intervention.
    Seriously, WTF? Am I the hot chick who goes around and signs people up for rehab after hours? This is just sad.

  24. I don’t get it. My Drag Queen Name is apparently Monica Tension. Huh? I prefer my pornstar name: Baggypuss Marsh.

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