I’m sure we’ve all had this happen before – you’re sitting there and for no particular reason at all, the strangest of recollections just pops to the forefront of your mind and interrupts your train of thought. Perhaps on some subconscious level, your mind is reliving snippets of your life and one of them happens to bubble to the threshold of awareness, like a bottom-dwelling fish rising to pucker its lips on the surface of a deep, dark lake.
So, I’m sitting here hard at work grading papers, thinking of nothing other than the plot structure of The Tell-Tale Heart, when suddenly the memory of a lining check from my first surrogacy attempt in 2004 swims into thought –
Juicy. Juicy? There are many quasi-appropriate adjectives for a good uterine lining: plush or thick, for example. Fluffy, even, if you’re the type that likes pink-tinted poodles and puts little heart-shaped stickers in your calendar on your projected transfer or IUI days. But juicy? Linings should never be referred to as juicy. That’s just disgusting and ruins the appeal and satisfaction of things like breakfast beverages and assorted grilled meats. And uh – you don’t touch my gut in a non-medical manner, and I’ll not touch yours in return, mmm’kay?
Now I wonder – what charming verbal nuggets have you heard from your doctors (reproductive or otherwise)? They can be any flavor of inappropriate – funny, offensive, illogical, or just plain stupid. What has a doctor said or done, that hours (or even years) later, has left you incredulously questioning, “Did he/she seriously just say/do that to me?”