The following is completely uncompensated, although, Powers that Be at EA Sports and Nintendo, should you happen upon this post and feel the need to grace me with gifts, I will not be opposed.
For our anniversary, Frank gifted me with the EA Active Personal Trainer Fitness game for the Wii (which henceforth will be referred to as simply the Wii Active). Before you think that from this gesture he was saying, "I love you, but DAYUM you've gotten fat through our 13 years of marriage, so here – you might want to do something about that," let me tell you that I've been asking for the Wii Active since forever. I currently weigh half past pudgy and a quarter 'til a double chin, so he got me exactly what I wanted. He even bought a second leg and resistance band so that he could work out with me. On the issue of my weight and my personal displeasure at the lump of soggy clay that is my body, Frank is the perfect support person. Though I tend to only feel sexy from the neck up, he truly thinks I'm sexy from head to toe, even when I'm sans face paint, my hair is like whoa, and I'm schlepping around the house baggy sweats and one of his old t-shirts. "I love you just the way you are," he says. "Anything you lose or whatever muscles you tone is just icing on the cake." Then turning on the cheddar he says, "I have you, so I have my cake. And I WILL eat it, too." Ahem. Take from that what you will.
Anyway, for those of you who know nothing of the Wii Active, a male or female trainer of your choosing whips your ass into shape through a series of programmed workout sessions. You make the use of the Wii controllers and a leg band so the game system can track your movement and a resistance band is used for arm-strengthening exercises. The program's 30 Day Challenge is a start-to-finish daily regimen of 15-30 minute workouts. The daily sessions get progressively more intense as your strength and stamina increase through the days. Additionally, you can do pre-made sessions or customize a workout session of your own. Activities include running, lower body and upper body exercises, as well as a variety of sports activities such as tennis, volleyball, basketball, inline skating, and even dance (which is quite funny a la Hitch, featuring dances like "do the lasso" and "bag the groceries"). The system tracks how many calories you burn on a daily basis and over a period of time. Rest days are built in, with one rest day to every two work days. The goal is to do 20 sessions in 30 day time period.
I have to admit that even though I almost desperately wanted the Wii Active, I was a bit skeptical at how effective a mere video game would be at helping me lose weight and get in shape. "Mere" my left butt cheek. Yesterday marked Day 2 of my 30 Day Challenge and let me tell you – it broke me down to such an extent that I ended up popping a Motrin. I hobbled around on legs that felt like Jello, as yesterday focused heavily on lower body work with various lunging and track activities. I broke a sweat like you wouldn't believe and burned a little over 160 calories in 20 minutes time. Muscles that I forgot existed woke up and spoke to me for the first time in years: "Where the fuck have you been?" they bitched, and they made my legs ache for the rest of the night in revenge for me having ignored them for so long.
Along with working out, I also got back on track with the South Beach Diet on Monday. I've been adhering to it strictly. Between working out for the past three days (I did a custom workout today since it's a Challenge rest day) and restricting the carbs, I'm happy to say that I'm down 5 pounds since Monday. I know it's mostly water weight (plus the gastric disposal of the steak and baked potato I had for dinner Sunday night), but it's extremely encouraging to see the numbers on the scale heading south so soon.
I'm actually looking forward to working out again, and I'm already feeling an increase in my energy levels.
Is anyone else doin' their thing with the Active or considering it?
In other news, Frank's cookies are getting ready to go live. Sort of. About a month ago, Frank decided that since he was starting school, he didn't want to be too overwhelmed so he wanted to delay the opening until later in the Fall. My face fell, but I understood and put all my plans for his business on the backburner. But since then, at least once or twice a week one of you emails or leaves a comment wanting to know where the cookies are because isn't he done baking them yet? and I'M HUNGRY AND HORMONAL AND WANT SOME DAMNED COOKIES SO CAN YOU PLEASE HURRY UP AND PUT UP THE LINK SO I CAN BUY SOME OF THOSE BIG ASS COOKIES YOU'RE AWAYS BRAGGING ABOUT EATING, YOU SKANK, HOW CAN YOU KEEP THEM FROM US, WE CAN'T ALL BE MARRIED TO FRANK!!!
So I stuck out my bottom lip and pouted a little bit on your behalf and coerced Frank into doing a "soft opening" of his bakery. He's still working on perfecting most of his more original creations and he refuses to budge on selling those until they're to his liking, for which I can't blame him. We don't want him sending sub-par cookies to you.
Also, for now we're keeping it simple and won't be ordering all the specialty packaging bells and whistles that we priced a couple of months ago and I'm not going to dress up the Etsy shop with fancy photography of his cookies, but I can guarantee that the actual cookies themselves won't be short-changed in the least. Besides, who cares about the package that a 4-inch diameter cookie came in? It totally misses the point of having the pleasure of shoving a 4-inch cookie in your mouth.
Additionally, we're also going to price them a bit cheaper than originally intended for now. We'll probably sell a dozen for $20-$22 with shipping included. Once he does his complete balls-to-the-walls open (and I'm thinking that probably won't be until after the new year), the overall cost between the product and shipping will go up a little. So get 'em now while the gettin' is good (and cheap).
So within the next week, you'll finally be able to purchase Frank's giant cookies in the varieties of chocolate chip, chocolate chip with either walnuts or pecans, sugar, the Aristocrat (chocolate chunks, dried cherries, & toffee), and the Monkeyboy (banana, walnut, chocolate chips).
Lori has graciously offered to write a review up on All Thumbs (after she sent one of those WHERE ARE THE DAMNED COOKIES emails and I told her I'd have Frank whip up a batch of chocolate chip cookies just for her), so be on the look out for that in the next week or so (speaking of Lori, I'll have a guest post up on Weebles Wobblog this Friday!).
I hope to have the Etsy shop completely running and ready to take orders by Monday with the first round of shipping to start by Thursday. Once we get a feel for how much of each cookie is being ordered, we will decrease the turnaround time between the time you place an order and the time we ship it.
Just so I can start getting an early indication of orders, if plan on ordering some cookies, please leave a comment letting me know which type of cookie you're ordering and whether you'll want more than a dozen. I think we'll also be giving you the option of ordering a dozen, but with 6 of one cookie and 6 of another. Leaving a comment in no way commits you to buying,
but it would groovy if y
ou did. *cheese*
Do you want to know what we finally agreed on to be Frank's bakery name? Here's my Show part of this rather long Tell:
When I post again letting you know that his shop is fully open and ready to take orders, I'll also announce the cookie name winners who will be receiving free cookies. We might not be offering those cookies now, but we have the intent to eventually once he finishes his recipe tweaking, so you'll get to cash in on your prizes now save it for later once more cookies are available.
The real question inherent in this post as a whole is whether or not I will avoid being a moron and undoing all the good the Wii Active is doing by having an endless supply of cookies around. Leaving myself open to such temptation just goes to show how much I love you guys.
See what the rest of the class is showing: