Caution

Lately I've been so busy that I don't know if I'm coming or going. Work sucks, a good friend moving far, far away sucks greater, I'm up to my eyeballs in essays that need to be graded, and there is last-minute Christmas shopping (I have bought a whopping total of ONE gift) that needs to be done.

I have a whole brainload full of unwritten posts that are screaming to come out, but I haven't had the time to write them, or when I do have the time, I don't have the energy. But —

you can bet your buttcheeks I'll be writing something TODAY about the NYT's latest anti-ART article. This one hits close to home, as it's about a surrogacy journey gone terribly, horribly wrong. From an objective standpoint, my opinion on the situation might ruffle some feathers. I hate that this situation — which I've been watching unfold for months — has come to the public light. But now that it has, I believe that it needs to serve as a cautionary tale for both intended parents and surrogates alike. The situation, in which a surrogate is awarded custody of the twins she carried, is one that I believe might have been avoided if both sides had made better decisions at the beginning.

I was hoping that this situation wouldn't come to the greater public light, but now that it has, this is a cautionary tale that needs to be told.

6 Comments

  1. Quiet Dreams on December 16, 2009 at 11:01 am

    I hope things get calmer for you really, really soon.
    *hugs*



  2. Pam on December 16, 2009 at 11:45 am

    I haven’t read the article, just a blog post by an IP who wrote a very good post about the inadequacies of the article. Check it out (unless you’ve already seen it. 🙂 –> http://artofbeinginfertile.blogspot.com/2009/12/all-news-thats-fit-to-print.html
    I’ll probably read the article but then I’ll get sucked in by the comments from ignorant people and get totally pissed off. 🙂



  3. Jo on December 16, 2009 at 2:05 pm

    I read the article, and as usual, was disgusted by the sensationalism and lack of sympathy for the parties involved. What happened was a tragedy, but one that could have been avoided — not by outlawing surrogacy or other ART treatments (as so many ignorant people are apt to recommend), but by creating legal statutes to protect ALL the people involved.
    Thinking of you, and hoping all calms down soon.
    Hugs,
    Jo



  4. Half of a Duo, Raising a Duo on December 16, 2009 at 2:12 pm

    I contributed to their fund to get the kids back, and I want to vomit reading that horrific article. How dare that surrogate be judge and jury. That couple had a valid homestudy from what I understand. WTH. What is the point of surrogacy if surrogates get to “run the show” just because they have the uterus and get COMPED for helping infertile couples.
    Oh and most of us who are infertile have valid homestudies once we begin the surrogacy process, having tried for YEARS to adopt. Yeah.
    I hope that fake GS chick gets busted for babyselling and taking comp.
    Don’t get me going on this one. It hits very close to home to us TS IPs I can tell you that. GRRRRRR.
    Oh and it gives surrogacy a horrible name, AND, makes IPs terrified to even consider it. So those of us who know wonderful women such as yourself have to go “underground” and help our infertile buddies find nondrama, non-crazy surrogates.
    Yikes.



  5. calliope on December 16, 2009 at 4:06 pm

    I miss you.
    I read this article online and totally wondered what your thoughts were.



  6. Eva on December 16, 2009 at 5:52 pm

    Hey! I was thinking about you when I read this article on Sunday. My heart really broke when I read that article for many reasons. I thought that the article was really disturbing. It really painted the world of ART in a very negative light. I felt a lot of compassion for the children in the situations profiled. It made me feel as if the world of ART is like the wild wild west. And if I didn’t know anything about it, when I read the article I don’t think I would have ever ventured into it.
    But please know that I am thinking of you. xo