Freaks on a Leash

Didn't you know that there's a leash law? How much do you owe for not keeping your inner freak on a leash?

I double-dog dare you to add up your fines and post how much you owe in the comments:

This is fun to do. Just read the 'offence' and if you've done it, you owe that fine.
You don't have to confess your answers, just the amount of your fine.
NOTE fines to be added once, not for how ever many times you have done it.

Smoked weed — $10
Did acid or pills — $5
Ever had sex at church — $25
Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you — $40
Had sex with someone on MySpace/Facebook/Bebo etc — $25
Had sex for money — $100
Ever had sex with a Puerto Rican — $20
Vandalized something — $20
Had sex on your parents' bed — $10
Beat up someone — $20
Been jumped — $10
Cross dressed — $10
Given money to stripper — $25
Been in love with a stripper — $20
Kissed someone who's name you didn't know — $0.10
Hit on some one of the same sex while at work — $15
Ever drive and drank — $20
Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk — $50
Used toys while having sex — $30
Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before — $20
Went skinny dipping — $5
Had sex in a pool — $20
Kissed someone of the same sex — $10
Had sex with someone of the same sex — $20
Cheated on your significant other — $10
Masturbated — $10
Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend — $20
Done oral — $5
Got oral — $5
Done / got oral in a vehicle while it was moving — $25
Stole something — $10
Had sex with someone in jail — $25
Made a nasty home video or took pictures — $15
Had a threesome — $50
Had sex in public — $20
Been in the same room while someone was having sex –$25
Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars– $20
Had sex with someone 10 years older — $20
Had sex with someone under the age accepted by rule of thumb (half your age plus 7) — $25
Been in love with two people or more at the same time– $50
Said you love someone but didn't mean it — $25
Went streaking — $5
Went streaking in broad daylight — $15
Been arrested — $5
Spent time in jail — $15
Pissed in the pool — $0.50
Played spin the bottle — $5
Done something you regret — $20
Had sex with your best friend — $20
Had sex with someone you work with at work — $25
Had anal sex — $80
Lied to your mate — $5
Lied to your mate about the sex being good — $25

Tally it up and put "My Fine Is $XXX" in the comments.

For the record, my fine is $340.


  1. GeekByMarriage on January 14, 2010 at 7:35 pm

    My Fine Is $785.10

  2. Kristin on January 14, 2010 at 7:45 pm

    Glad I don’t have to admit which ones I did. My “fine” is $345

  3. Kristin on January 14, 2010 at 7:46 pm

    Ooooooooh, will you be my friend?

  4. GeekByMarriage on January 14, 2010 at 7:48 pm

    Hell yeah I will! I was going to put that if anyone got more then me that they should email me ASAP! LMAO!

  5. Cindy on January 14, 2010 at 8:37 pm

    My fine is over $400. I lost count. I refuse to go back with a calculator because…wow.

  6. staciet on January 14, 2010 at 8:57 pm

    Um, I am feeling a bit prudish. (I didn’t think I was either!) My fine was only $140.60. Apparently, I need to get out more!

  7. Miss W on January 14, 2010 at 9:05 pm

    Only $285.60.
    I did not count the “acid” one — I got $0.10 for kissing someone whose name I do not know, who just happened to have dropped acid a few minutes before. I came home with a bad headache, but come on, it was a Bloodhound Gang/Iggy Pop concert πŸ˜‰
    Also, anyone who does not have at least $0.50 after their dollar figure? Is a liar! I don’t think ANYONE made it through childhood without peeing in the pool!

  8. Melissa on January 14, 2010 at 9:29 pm

    i got tired of adding. πŸ™‚ i do blame the red wine i’m drinking though.

  9. GeekByMarriage on January 14, 2010 at 9:30 pm

    Crap you’re right! Wasn’t thinking about childhood hi-jinks!

  10. Ali on January 14, 2010 at 9:31 pm

    My fine is $520.10 Youch.

  11. Megan on January 14, 2010 at 9:55 pm

    I got pretty far into the list thinking I was going to come up with no fines at all, but my final tally is $310.
    P.S.- If you get the fine for pool pissing or kissing someone whose name you don’t know, you automatically tell on yourself because those have unusual values (the rest are multiples of $5).

  12. a on January 14, 2010 at 10:07 pm

    Crap…reading the comments, I forgot my number! I think it was $335.60.

  13. Moxie on January 14, 2010 at 10:11 pm

    Okay so add $.50 to my total, rofl.

  14. Sunny on January 14, 2010 at 10:27 pm

    Biggest dork so far. $125.50.
    And honestly I don’t even remember ever peeing in a pool.

  15. Trish K on January 14, 2010 at 10:35 pm

    $540.50 πŸ™‚

  16. GeekByMarriage on January 14, 2010 at 10:38 pm

    Damn, girl!

  17. Alexicographer on January 14, 2010 at 10:44 pm

    Apparently a and I are twins, because $335.60. Although I’m pretty sure I did know his name at the time (actually, upon reflection, I think it was Nick, and this is more than 20 years later, and for the record he was a friend-of-a-friend, so …), and I’m applying the “kid” rule to the pool question. So maybe just $335. On the other hand, I married the guy who’s more than 10 years my senior, so maybe that’s worth more (or less) than just jumping in the sack …
    Also, I’d like to share the following funny story about item #4 on the list (“Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you”): At my brother-in-law’s 50th birthday party, much alcohol was consumed; most guests spent the night, and DH and I ended up sleeping snuggled on a twin mattress on the floor in the basement because after the guys’ (DH and his DBs’) dad showed up for the party (unexpected), there was one bed too few. Right before bedtime I was cold and shouted at my BIL for something to put over my t-shirt; he tossed me a sweatshirt. It happened to belong to one of my nieces-by-marriage, i.e., the wife of one of my husband’s nephew’s (got that)? First thing hungover DH (who had crawled into bed with me in the dark) noticed when he woke up (I was still sleeping) was that he was sleeping next to a woman wearing his niece-by-marriage’s sweatshirt (so he assumed I was her and obviously the question was, what was he doing sleeping beside her). Hilarity ensued ;)).

  18. Sara on January 14, 2010 at 11:05 pm

    $335. I truly don’t ever remember peeing in a pool. If I did so as a young child, then add 0.50.

  19. Baby On Mind on January 14, 2010 at 11:33 pm

    Oh no! I’m the biggest prude yet. $120.50. Yep, peed in the pool!

  20. Erica on January 15, 2010 at 7:52 am

    I love the ten cent one. I have to pass the post on to my non blogging friends. I am too shy to do my total XXX.

  21. kimbosue on January 15, 2010 at 9:04 am

    $450! WOWZA. I feel like a floozy.

  22. WhichBox on January 15, 2010 at 9:20 am

    I thought I was middle of the road, but now I appear a bit prudish. 170.50

  23. jenn on January 15, 2010 at 9:30 am

    Ha- this is hilarious!
    $290.50. Seems to be petty middle of the road- I guess.
    And yes- 100% positive there was some point in my youth when I peed in a pool. πŸ˜‰

  24. cheryllookingforward on January 15, 2010 at 9:35 am

    Only $165.10. I was pretty calm in college.
    I never peed in the pool because everyone told me it turned the water all around you purple! Was that a lie?!! I should have done it…

  25. Rory on January 15, 2010 at 11:16 am

    Delurking (I think) to say $365.50

  26. Pam on January 15, 2010 at 11:25 am

    My fine is $335.50

  27. heather on January 15, 2010 at 12:42 pm

    my fine is 438.60….oops!!

  28. heather on January 15, 2010 at 12:53 pm

    is it wrong that some of those i couldnt remember if i had or not?

  29. GeekByMarriage on January 15, 2010 at 1:00 pm

    It’s never too late!

  30. The Missus on January 15, 2010 at 1:56 pm

    This is hilarious!!

  31. Shelli on January 15, 2010 at 3:01 pm

    damn, I guess I’m not as lily white as I think I am!

  32. mrs spock on January 15, 2010 at 3:42 pm

    Holy shit. I am lame. $110.60. Look at me, I’m Sandra Dee?

  33. staciet on January 15, 2010 at 4:07 pm

    It makes me feel a bit better to see I am not the only calm one out there!

  34. Moxie on January 15, 2010 at 4:15 pm

    “Lousy with virginity…”
    From henceforth you shall be deemed Sandra Dee! LOL!

  35. Moxie on January 15, 2010 at 4:16 pm

    That probably just means that you need to add in some extra dollars for drinking (hence the forgetfulness). LOL!

  36. Jo on January 15, 2010 at 6:57 pm

    $385.50 — and my husband STILL think’s I’m a goody two-shoes. Totally not sharing this list with him. LOL!

  37. anymommy on January 16, 2010 at 12:38 am

    $320. But it was all the un-shocking ones πŸ˜‰

  38. Manapan on January 16, 2010 at 2:50 am

    $485.60. I wasn’t going to admit it until I read the comments, though!

  39. susanb573 on January 17, 2010 at 10:00 am

    I’m almost ashamed to write it. My total is 75.50. How is that possible? When all five kids are grown I’m going to have to go out and be wild a bit more.

  40. Betty M on January 19, 2010 at 6:34 am

    200.60 – does getting over 200 get me out of total prudedom?

  41. C h i r l e e n on January 20, 2010 at 7:35 pm


  42. Jen on February 1, 2010 at 2:45 am

    $110.50. You may call me Ms. Stick in the Mud, thank you very much…

  43. Liz on February 2, 2010 at 11:56 am

    Totally late in the game, but thought it was fun. I ended with 110.10. OUch, I think that’s the lowest on here,… which means I’m boring.

  44. MFA Mama on February 3, 2010 at 10:25 pm

    $520.60…I’m going to The Hot Place, aren’t I?

  45. Clare on February 11, 2010 at 6:19 pm

    Lost track somewhere around 325.50.