You're invited. BYOB

K & J invitation 2


Though the twins’ birthday is in June, over time we’ve found it better to host their party in May before the school year is over. Once summer hits, kids in these parts scatter to the wind quite rapidly, mostly because this is a military town and many people here aren’t from here. In the summer, many of the kids’ friends return to wherever “home” is to visit grandparents and family. Having Kyra and Jaiden’s birthday party about a month early in May ensures that their friends will be in town for the event. Of course, with Jordan’s birthday falling on May 22 (which usually is also in the last week of school), this means we’re slammed with parties in May. We could stretch it out through the month and have a party three weekends out of the month, but because we’re insane, we opt instead to jam pack the parties into a single weekend. One shot, one kill, and whatnot. We’re balls to the wall people like that.

This weekend’s schedule will go something like this:

Friday night- Pack overnight clothes for the family, make goodie bags, load everything into the SwaggerWagon, stay up way too late watching mindless TV.

8 a.m.  Pretend to still be asleep so that Frank will get up to handle the customary early-morning argument between Kaelyn and a sibling (probably Kyra).

9:30  a.m.  Get up, get dressed, eat, bark commands, and answer, “It’s not time to go, yet,” for the infinity2 times that Kaelyn will ask.

11:00 a.m. Depart, hopefully with everything we need. Pick up Jordan’s cake. Head to the bowling alley. Set up for the party.

12:00-2:00 p.m.   Jordan’s birthday party (his 8th). Stay until all kids are picked up.

3:00 p.m.    Check-in at the hotel. Set up in the pool area for the twins’ party. Gird loins.

4:00-7:00 p.m.    Twins’ pool party. Hope dearly that plenty of friends come to the pool party and around half stay for the slumber party (DearGodpleasenomorethanhalf).

7:00-8:00  p.m.     Pick-up for the kids not staying overnight, then head upstairs with the sleepover kids.

8:00-11:00 p.m.    Showers, pajamas, junk food, order a Now Showing in Theaters kids’ movie on Pay-Per-View. Exchange regularly scheduled OMFGwhattheheckwerewethinking text messages with Frank and vow never to do this again.

12:00 a.m.         Lights out for anyone still awake. Prank Kyra (and Frank will prank Jaiden).

7:25 a.m.            Wake up call, everyone dressed, packed, and downstairs.

8:00-9:00 a.m.    Breakfast (“Full breakfast selections, like cereals, oatmeal, pastries, waffles, bacon, and eggs – none of that powdered stuff,” says the hotel concierge).

10:00 a.m.    Kids’ pick-up time/ checkout

10:30ish       Head home bedraggled, but basking in the You guys are the BEST! PARENTS! EVAAAR! sentiments and promptly forget what we said about never doing this again.


My favorite birthday party was my tenth. Like the twins, it was also the first time I had a sleepover party. We were stationed in Frankfurt, Germany at the time. In the afternoon, I had maybe 20 or so friends show up. I don’t know how she did it, but my mom crafted this mega neighborhood-wide scavenger hunt. There were about 25 items on our list; some things she hid around the building, and others we had to knock door-to-door to find (we lived in a close-knit military housing complex, so neighbors were supportive and welcomed things like this). For some reason, a coin from the year I was born (1978) and a Christmas napkin are the two items that stick out in my mind the most. We grouped together in teams of two or three and had an hour to find as many items as we could and report back to my house. Just by sheer coincidence, my friend and I managed to find the most items.

After the lunch/cake/gifts bit, all of the boys and some of the girls went home. I had six or seven friends spend the night. We did the typical girls’ sleepover stuff: camped out on the floor in the living room, watched movies late into the night, and giggled over stupid stuff. In the morning, mom made a huge breakfast for us. She probably had OMFGwhattheheckwasIthikingI’mneverdoingthisagain moments (didja, Lady?), but I know for sure that I was all BEST! MOTHER! EVAAAR! for the next few days.

What was your best childhood birthday party?

12 thoughts on “You're invited. BYOB”

  1. Wow… I had forgotten about this one! I actually didn’t have that “OMFGwhattheheckwasIthikingI’mneverdoingthisagain” feeling. LOL… I did however, have it that time I fed the entire cast for one of your plays for lunch.
    In general, all went smoothly; however, after the third, double batch of fried chicken wings, which caused me to have to run to the store to get more cooking oil because the other oil couldn’t take anymore, getting popped several times, making all the other goodies, in between keeping the chicken assembly line going, and packing the food up, while keeping the chicken assembly line going, and wrapping all of that chicken, you got it, while keeping the last two batches of chicken assembly line going; I swore I would NEVER fry chicken wings again! Or chicken for that matter. LOL… It was well worth it when I saw the look on your face when I told you to go get your lunch out of the car!
    I don’t have a favorite birthday party as a kid. I sat here thinking and I couldn’t remember if I ever had a birthday party. Surely I did somewhere along the way.
    My favorite birthday party was when Pops threw a surprise party for me and I was 9 months pregnant with Chanel. You and I went to the movies and saw The Secret of Nimh. You did really well keeping it a secret!
    Good times!!!!!!!! Yes, they were.

  2. My 16th surprise party was the best. My boyfriend, brother and the rest of the Dream Team were at LSU, so that’s where I spent every weekend. My mom packed a whole party get-up plus a cake in the trunk of the car, picked me up from HS and drove to B.R. I don’t know how or when they unloaded the car and set up, but I had the best party ever. I was already three sheets to the wind (yeah, I started and stopped drinking at an early age) when I opened my mom’s present and read the letter that was enclosed. I cried like a baby b/c it was so touching. Anyway, that was the best ever and my parents weren’t even there for it:(
    So, since I live so far away, I’ll be attending the pool party AND the sleep-over. i’ll have my mom sign this and fax it right over to you. Thanks! Oh, and Happy Birthday, Jordan, Kyra and Jaiden! Your mom rocks!!!

  3. SUCH a cute invite!!
    My birthdays are all wrapped up inside of Christmas but in the summer I turned 5.5 I had a 1/2 birthday at a skate rink and it was fantastic! (except for the DJ playing the wrong song)

  4. Wow! You have a fun and busy day approaching 🙂 Happy birthday wishes all around!
    My favorite birthday party was when I was in elementary school and my mom invited my whole class over and then some girls stayed the night. My mom had decorated the entire house in a Valentine’s theme (February birthday) and had made so many delicious treats. I remember gingham heart pillows, chocolate and red hots, and tons of little girls running around in flouncy clothes from my dress-up bin. It’s a beautiful memory but no doubt my mom was vowing never to do that again!

  5. Wow, best parents ever! That is going to be a great party.
    I remember my mom letting me have a Valentine’s Party when I was in fifth grade. She got us a table at a restaurant and I invited all the girls in my class and we all felt so incredibly grown up.

  6. You are completely and totally insane!! But, you and F will be deemed the BEST PARENTS EVER for at least a couple of weeks, I’m sure. I don’t remember any fantastic birthday parties. I’m pretty sure there were some cool ones, but I just don’t remember………….

  7. The best one I had started at home, where we ate pizza and decorated visors with paint pens. We then went to the Family Fun Center wearing said visors, and spent hours playing minigolf, driving the gokarts, and crashing the bumper boats. I remember having an ice cream cake that was too frozen to eat with plasticware (my dad used dry ice to prevent it from melting in the June heat), so we took it back to the house and ate it there instead. I think there was a pinata too, and my best friend spent the night afterward.
    Other great parties that I attended and helped plan included a friend’s Double Dare party (like the game show, complete with messy physical challenges), and the time when 8 of us got dressed up, picked up by a limo, and spent the night at the Embassy Suites.
    Best of luck to you and Frank; you two definitely deserve awards for throwing 3 parties in one day!

  8. Wow – you all are insane!!!
    I think it was my 8th grade year – it was a boy-girl party. Once the boys left, us, girls, actually camped out down on the farm (laugh all you want).
    I can’t believe they are going to be celebrating a 10th birthday – double digits?! Weeping now.

  9. love this! you guys are so much fun. they’re going to have the best time. and you and frank are going to wear out your batteries texting.
    probably my best was 16, when my mom rented a limo for me and 5 friends to go to Big City for lunch and dinner and a show (and our driver let us bring our own booze). though the ones with boys were fun too.

  10. Sounds like a lot of fun! Gird your loins is right!
    My favorite birthday memory is actually a very small party that we had in a Days Inn room – just my family. We were in Florida visiting my grandparents and headed up to Orlando for a couple of days to visit the Magic Kingdom (awesome!) and it was my first trip there, my birthday and just a few days later my grandfather’s birthday. I just remember sitting in that room eating cake, with the door open to the sunny Florida weather (this is in April when the weather in NY could best be summed up as “crappy complete with snow”) surrounded by my family, with the promise of seeing Mickey Mouse the next day. Best!

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