Remember Nancy

It is with a heavy heart that I write this post. Nancy Leisher of Infertile and Sarcastic/The New Life of Nancy,  passed away on Monday.  She was a blogger whom many of us loved; the news of her loss had finally circulated down to the infertility community yesterday via Facebook. She leaves behind a husband, two daughters, and a son. From the limited information available, the best guess so far is that she threw a blood clot from a prior surgery.

Nancy gave the best descriptions of herself–“shnarky as hell”– and that spunky sarcasm and self-effacing honesty is what we loved most about her. I remember her as being one who was always there to give a virtual hug and words of support, beginning with a punch like, “That sucks sweaty donkey balls….”

She was a no holds barred, roller derby, tattooed ninja badass, and she had heart of gold and loved her family fiercely.

She blogged only sporadically after 2010, but she dropped in every now and then update us, to get support, or to make us laugh.

I went to her blog last night to re-read her last post. It was written on February 11 of this year, coincidentally, my birthday. It was a short one:

“what is your favorite curse word?” 

That’s Nancy. Somehow it seems almost fitting for those to be the last words that she left for us here in the blogosphere. Knowing Nancy, she wouldn’t have wanted us to be sad for her for too long. I can almost hear her saying something like, “Yeah, so I’m not here today. Don’t let that stop you from getting up and kicking ass tomorrow. Don’t cry for me; I’m going kick ass and take names wherever I go. You should, too.”


Nancy gave so much support to the infertility community, and the infertility community gave that right back to her. Let’s give Nancy and her family one last swell of support.

Donations will be given to Nancy’s family or to wherever they designate for donations to be sent. The specifics about her funeral have not yet been given, but it is currently planned for Friday, July 13th (I think Nancy is having a good laugh over that one).

I believe that Nancy’s family was from Arizona, but she’s lived in Colorado with her husband and children for years. If the funeral is going to be held in Colorado, we’re going to see if  Lori of Write Mind, Open Heart can attend to represent the infertility community.

Please share this with others via Twitter, Facebook, and your own blogs. I will continue to update this post with more information as it becomes known. You can donate by clicking on the button above, and I will also place it in my sidebar  for the next week.


Nancy, my favorite curse word is shitfire. Give ’em hell, MurdeRita derby girl. xoxo


57 thoughts on “Remember Nancy”

  1. Oh my gosh I cannot believe this. I feel so incredibly sad for her husband and kids. She loved those kids so much! I am so sad that they will not have her in their lives as they grow up. Beyond heartbroken for her family.

  2. Thank you for posting this. I have been in shock fir the past day since finding out. I keep thinking I’ll be able to pick up the phone & hear her snark once more. She truly had the biggest and sweetest heart wrapped inside the most outgoing, outspoken & real fearless mommy lioness I have ever known. I will miss her terribly & always always wish I had more time with her. She was more of a friend to me than people I have known for a decade plus and got to see everyday.
    She was fearless yet fragile with all her surgeries and trials. I know her children were her heart- her everything. My thoughts and prayers are with them that they get to hold her memory and i hope they get some of her strength & humor and everlasting snark. They will always have the fiercest guardian angel watching over them and urging them to live life with everything they have- just like she did.

  3. Nancy was one of those people that made you want to be them when you grew up. She was a badass with a heart of gold. I’ve been looking at old emails from her this morning and smiling/crying. I hope somebody can attend the funeral.

  4. I didn’t know Nancy as well as some of you but I adored her bad ass self. Well, fuckitall, I hope MurdeRita is kicking ass and taking names…cause I’m gonna miss the hell out out of her.

    1. I remember that she was matched to you. She bought socks for you from a cool sock shop that I turned her onto, then she bought $150 of derby socks for herself and blamed it on me. πŸ™‚

      (and I definitely think that you’re a permanent badass)

  5. I am so sorry to hear about this. I did not know her, but I do relate to her struggles with infertility and it is so sad that she is not here with her family. You mentioned that she threw a clot from a previous surgery: do you have any more details about that? I have a blood clotting disorder, and I wonder if she unknowingly had one too. I did not know about my disease until I had a major event 5 years ago and almost died.

    1. Nancy seemed to have some of the worst luck medically speaking. I think her last surgery was in January (maybe?)…at least that was the last one that she blogged about. She had been experiencing some problems hearing and after a lot of testing, it was determined that part of a bone in her ear was missing. The surgery required the docs to remove a small part of her skull and lift a part of her brain to get to the part of her ear that needed to be fixed. It sounds intense (and it was), but just like Nancy, she rebounded quickly. Because she didn’t post too often this year either on her blog or on Facebook, the specific recovery details are kind-of sketchy. My guess is that if it was a clot, it might have had something to do with that or one of her other surgeries.

      I hope that your clotting issues — now that they’re known — are being controlled so that you’re not at risk. Thanks for leaving kind words about Nancy. xo

  6. Too young for this – but, boy did she ever hit all the worst case scenarios after all of her surgeries. So sad…especially for her children.

    Thanks for updating – Kristin posted about it, but didn’t have any details. I’ll miss her commentaries – especially since I often had a different view.

  7. I’ve been trying to process this since last night.

    It’s odd, because I didn’t get to know her all that well. I only ‘met’ her in early 2010, and it was about that time that she slowed down on posting. She was my first Sock It To Me buddy, and the checkered skull and crossbones socks she sent me were my lucky socks all through my pregnancy with Ginny. Nancy is forever tied to my memories of blood draws, ultrasounds, doctor appointments, and Ginny’s birth. Those (very worn out) socks are now in Ginny’s memory box, along with the outfit she came home from the hospital in, and our hospital bands. Someday, I’ll tell my daughter about this community, and about the woman who sent those silly socks to me when I needed them most.

    My heart goes out to her family and loved ones.

    1. Your comment got my tears flowing again. What a sweet, sweet memory of Nancy that you’ll (and Ginny) will be able to carry with you forever.

  8. I am still in shock and denial. It couldn’t possibly be true. I heard yesterday and my heart skipped a beat or two. I “met” Nancy online in 2006. We were on the WebMD boards together. I very much loved her snark because she made me laugh and was my opposite when it comes to that — I would never have her guts — who would, really?

    We exchanged Christmas cards in the past and she even sent me a pair of knee socks. I am glad I have that sentiment to remember her by.

    Nancy, if you can read this, know that you touched so many lives. This is a tragedy; you were way too young and having way too much fun in life. Your legacy will live on through Ella, Allison, and Karl. RIP, Queen of Schnarky!

      1. I went back and found her last comment on my blog. It was on 10/27/11. “nancy said…

        ” I love these lists of random things.

        Funny you should talk about being under the covers. Until about the time I had kids, I could NEVER sleep with my feet uncovered, even if it was 120 degrees. I felt, for some reason, I was safe from the unknown with them covered. Like the chick from the ring would come out of my tv, plod towards me in her attempt to kill me and then have to give up and go back to the tv when she saw my feet were covered.”

  9. I met Nancy back in 2006 through a mommy website and then followed her blog.. She was an amazing woman and will truly be missed! She’s someone I used to live through vicariously! She was so badass!! Miss you Nancy!!!

  10. I read this and almost threw-up. The blood drained from my face and my heart broke for her kids. Nancy was an awesome person that didn’t hold back on her opinions. She will truly be missed.

  11. Oh my gosh! I hadn’t heard about this until reading your post. We only briefly intersected, she commented on my blog once and I read her for a while. She had a VOICE and will be so missed.

  12. This saddens me. Nancy was one of the most gentle (in a badass sort of way) souls! I will never forget Nancy-heck, she was the first person I told that I was pregnant. She could always read a home pregnancy test!
    Rest in peace, sweet Nancy.

  13. Our paths had crossed once or twice, but I never knew her, really … and yet, what an astounding, firecracker voice she had. What a loss.

  14. I simply cannot believe Nancy died. What a complete shock. Those poor kids and hubby :-

  15. My name is Ryan. Nancy was my best friend. I thank you for putting this together for her blogging friends, I know how much her blog meant to her. I saw that you didn’t have the memorial information and I wanted to make sure it was available.
    “America The Beautiful” Chapel 1730 East Fountain Boulevard Colorado Springs, Colorado 80910
    Nancy was like no other. My heart will never be the same.

    1. Thank you so much, Ryan, for the memorial information that you’ve provided here. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I’ve lost friends before, but never a *best* friend. Hugs and love to you in this difficult time, Ryan.

  16. I met Nancy on webmd in 2007. I don’t think the news has completely sunk in yet. I still expect to find out this is just a dream or some dirty rumor, but it’s not looking like that is the case. I wish it was though. She may have been too young for this, but she lived a very full life. Nancy was a one of a kind person. She was the kind of schnarky badass everybody loved. I respected that she knew where she stood on things and didn’t second guess herself; it’s a characteristic I wish I had. I hope that her kids have inherited her personality because the world needs more tell it like it is people.

  17. You are very welcome. I know that Nancy had an impact on many. Nancy and I met more than 20 years ago. She introduced me to my late husband. She named her son Karl after him. She was like no other. I still can’t wrap my head around the fact she is gone.

  18. Ryan- Thank you for sharing the service information. I can’t imagine how this has hit you. She was such a special person and friend. My thoughts and prayers are with all her family and friends.

  19. Mrs Gamgee’s story makes me remember when I was trying to get pregnant with my second child. She wasn’t my Sock It To Me buddy, but I got a random package in the mail with an awesome pair of pink and grey derby socks. They were from Nancy. They were my lucky socks. I wore them at most of my OB appointments. They always got a double take. That’s about as bad ass as I’ll ever get!

  20. I followed Nancy’s blog since before she got pregnant with Karl. Such a great loss. Mel’s right. The blogosphere does fell different tonight.

  21. This just slays me. My heart hurts for her family. While we both became sporadic bloggers, she popped in from time to time to share the schnarky love. I’ll miss her!

  22. Pingback: Rock Out with Your Socks and Tattoos Out in Remembrance of Nancy

  23. There’s a very special garden
    Where the trees of memory grow
    Nurtured by the kindness
    And concern that good friends show.
    The roots are cherished memories
    Of good times in the past
    The branches tender promises
    That souls endure and last.
    It’s a place of peace and beauty
    Where bright new hopes can start
    It’s memory’s lovely garden
    That soothes the hurting heart.

    Nancy was a bad ass chick and she never turned back.i have known her for a while and watched her children grow from the time her oldest was a toddler. I can’t imagine the pain her family feels.

  24. Nancy made me laugh and reflect and she wasn’t afraid to kick me in the butt when I needed it. She encouraged us all to push through on the hard days … Nancy even sent me a pair of boxing gloves to underscore the need to be a fighter. She and her family are in my thoughts and prayers.

  25. I may not have met Nancy in real life, but I still called her a friend. I met her online, on the fitness website we were both on. She was funny, crazy, snarky, fun, and amazing, and I am missing her very much. I was scrolling through texts today and the last one she sent me just said “I love you baby girl”. Cue the waterworks. And then I hear her voice in my head telling me to stop being such a pussy. πŸ™‚

  26. I had not met Nancy or read her words until today.
    Thank you for sharing her soul with us.

    I am so terribly sorry about the loss of such a special friend, mother, wife.

    Wishing peace to everyone who loved her.

    1. Oops. Probably shouldn’t have assumed she was married. And now that I look more closely at what is in her posts, I’m seeing her children.

      And so much love there.

  27. I haven’t meet Nancy yet but I know she’s a good and loving person. I’m sorry for her loss and I pray for her family that they will be okay, especially her kids. πŸ™‚

  28. Pingback: When a Friend Dies

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