How I try not to suck at parenting
Jordan zoomed through the kitchen on his Nimbus 2000 and just as he was reaching for the Golden Snitch, he tripped over the cat, came to an abrupt stop, and was bludgeoned in the crotch by the broomstick he rode in on. "OW, I crunched my vagina!" he bleated, with his knees squeezed together and …
I’ve seen Wordless Wednesday around and I’m short on words tonight, so why the heck not? Yes folks, that’s my bra. Well, it was my bra through the tail end of my pregnancy with Baby M. My boobs had outgrown everything I owned and I finally decided that prehaps it might be a good idea …
"Mom." "Jordan, why are you out of the bed? I just tucked you in." "I need some underwear." "You didn’t put on underwear after you got out of the tub? You have on shorts, so just go to bed and in the morning you can put on some undies." "As soon as I wake up, …
of why my sucky day got infinitely better after I got home: Mia called a few minutes after I walked in the door with the great news that they were accepted into the clinic’s shared risk program. She also forwarded me a copy of our contract from the attorney and except for a few minor …
Spiderman shouted, "GOOD MORNIIIIIIIING!!!" and I was served breakfast in bed. To hell with alarm clocks. I’ll take syrup-flavored kisses and sticky fingers any morning. Lupron in 2 days.
You might want to cover your mouth with a facemask or put on some latex gloves as you read this. Hell, even a full-body biohazard suit might be best. I might still be contagious. Seeing as how I’m the only person who crossed the threshhold of my house last week that didn’t come down with …
The husband – Frank – stay at home dad extraordinaire, diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in 1998 and in remission since 2002 (!!!), medically-retired US Army soldier. The way he kung-fus the kids around the house you'd never know he had a potentially debilitating neurological disease. He is my main cheese, the dude, the maestro of …
I owe you a post about my big gay weekend (it was fun – as seen here). I did not get to dance with drag queens (boo), but I did get my picture taken with Derek J from Real Housewives of Atlanta (yay!). Sock It to Me matches went out today (word!), and I’m recovering …
Flashback ~ Week 13 ~ Invasion of the Body Snatchers Read More »
Over the next several weeks, I’m going to slowly unify my old writing pieces into this one location here at The Smartness. On Mondays, I’m going to post entries from my old blogs (excluding I’m a Smart One, since that stuff is already here), working my way slowly up until everything has been moved over. I’m …
Flashback Monday – Twins' Pregnancy Introduction Read More »