Adoption, Loss, Infertility, & Surrogacy Resources

This is by no means an exhaustive list of where I go to read, learn, and offer support. These are just a few of the sites and personal blogs that were catalysts in changing my way of thinking or expanding my knowledge.

General Infertility

  • – The National Infertility Association
  • Stirrup Queens –  Melissa Ford, author of Navigating the Land of IF, has opened up her personal blog to be a veritable “home base” for many in the greater ALI community. Don’t miss her 3,000+ strong ultimate ALI blog roll.
  • The Infertility Voice – Keiko Zoll is one of the most influential thought leaders in the ALI community. Her calls to action and strong voice (and sparkling personality!) definitely makes her one to watch.
  • Sher Institutes for Reproductive Medicine (SIRM) Forums: On these message boards, the SIRM reproductive endocrinologists volunteer their time to answer your infertility-related problems (for FREE!). There’s a treasure trove of information there, and the docs there have helped to quell more than a few of my cycling freakouts through the years.


  • Surrogate Mothers Online (SMO) – Aside from reading a few books, I learned almost everything there is to know about surrogacy from the message boards here. I’m now the senior moderator and the public relations representative at SMO.


  • life from here – luna is the writer of this personal blog. Her blog began with her processing the recent loss of her son (due to premature labor) while she continued IVF treatments. When those were unsuccessful, she and her husband pursued adoption. Being able to follow her thought process as she learned about open vs. closed adoption, made decisions, and nurtured the subsequent relationship with her birthmother helped broaden my views and opinions about adoption.
  • Write Mind, Open Heart – I first came to know Lori well after she adopted her two children. Because she is further down the line in parenting after open adoption, I continue to learn so much about how to continue nurturing the relationship in the open adoption triangle — the children, the parents, and the birth parents/family. Open heart, indeed.
  • Bereaved and Blessed – Along with luna above, I first found Kathy’s blog shortly after the loss of her baby. In 2008, Kathy’s daughter Molly was born at just shy of 30 weeks via scheduled c-section when the congenital heart defects which were incompatible with life became a threat to Kathy’s life. Molly lived in love for 14 minutes before passing away. Kathy’s grace in dealing with grief–and helping others cope with theirs–continues to amaze me.
  • Glow in the Woods – Glow is a group blog written by and for women and men who have experience neonatal loss. It is a moving tapestry of words and emotions. I recommend Glow not only as a resource to those who’ve experienced the loss of a baby, but also for the people who support them. A post that I wrote in 2009 was nominated for a “Glowing in the Woods” award: Glow (in which I recount supporting a friend within the hour after she lost a baby at 22 weeks).

Who are you learning from? 


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